Unmet Expectations

Now there was a famine in the land,

and Abram went down to Egypt to live there

for a while because the famine was severe.

Genesis 12:10

What am I to think when I answer God's call only to step into heartache and pain?  Or I take a leap of faith only to land in a wasteland?  Or I do what God is asking of me only to be rewarded with struggle?  I thought if I obeyed I'd be blessed!  I think to myself.  It was my understanding that God would make my paths straight and the going easy if I trusted Him completely.  I expected things to go smoothly if I only did what He said to do.

The problem here is not with God but with my expectations.  His ways are higher than my ways so it follows that God's plan would be way beyond anything I could comprehend.  Therefore, why would I think things would turn out the way I expect?  He has something much better in mind.

As a result, when I answer God's call but instead of triumph I experience what seems like defeat, I can take heart knowing that God's love for me is not diminished one iota and His good plan is still in effect.  I must look through eyes of faith and trust in the One who has my best interest at heart and who promised to never leave me and to always take care of my needs.  (Romans 8:28,Deuteronomy 31:6, Matthew 6:31-33)

Or when I take a risk and jump into the great unknown only to land on what seems like shaky ground, I can remember that God's plan transcends my understanding.  While I focus more on the here and now, His focus is eternal.  He takes me places I'd never go on my own steam so that I can learn things about Him, His kingdom and my faith that I'd never otherwise comprehend.  The life of a follower of Christ involves on-the-job training!

Or when I do what God asks me to do only to find my circumstances taking a turn for the worse, I can remember that God's blessings are mostly spiritual, not physical.    Through the struggle I will be rewarded with the blessings of experiencing the comfort that only comes from the Father of Compassion, or His tender love that gives me hope for what is to come, or His grace that makes each breath possible.  Sometimes, simply the awareness of how much I have been given is a much greater blessing than receiving all the riches in the world yet being ignorant of God's intimate touch.

Today, it is my intention to look at my current situation through eyes of faith, dropping my fleshly expectations of what I think should happen and simply let God be God, not limiting Him in any way by what I think He has planned for my life.  Instead, I want to see God's plan for what it is: perfect, good, and completely beyond my ability to comprehend.

Eyes of Faith

"Then Caleb silenced the people before Moses and said,

'We should go up and take possession of the land,

for we can certainly do it.'"

Numbers 13:30

God promised a land flowing with milk and honey.  I'm sure each Israelite formed a picture in their own mind of what that looked like.  Some probably expected abundant fruit, others looked forward to a land to call their own, while still others anticipated peace and prosperity.  Whatever they imagined, I'm sure they didn't expect what they actually received: A land abundantly filled with rich resources yet occupied by giant, powerful people.  It wasn't quite what they envisioned.

Its not so different with me.  I read of God's promise to bring good out of every situation, but my definition of "good" differs from God's.  Therefore, when God's good is delivered, I don't recognize it but label it as difficulty, hardship or impossibility.

This Christmas, let me take on eyes of faith.  As I celebrate the most generous gift of all delivered through the lowly birth of a babe who seemed to be anything but a king but in actuality was a Savior who rescued me from eternal death and ushered me into His kingdom as the precious child of a loving God, let me see the world through kingdom eyes.

Let me see things with an eternal perspective instead of expecting to receive my reward or blessings now.  Let me notice how God is growing me, using the hard times to transform my mind and heart.  And let me see how God's definition of good is so much better than mine.

Jesus is the fulfillment of the greatest promise ever made and the perfect example of how God's good came in an unexpected package.

Expectations

"Here is a trustworthy saying:

If we died with him,

we will also live with him;

if we endure,

we will also reign with him.

If we disown him,

he will also disown us;

if we are faithless,

he remains faithful,

for he cannot disown himself."

2 Timothy 2:11-13

There are many things I expect out of life.  I want to be able to live a comfortable, happy life, at least within reason.  I don't ask for much, I rationalize, so the few things I do enjoy I should be able to receive.  I also expect a minimal level of respect from those I come into contact with; after all, I am an important person. . . at least I am to me!  Another thing I expect is to reach my goals and to live my dreams.  What's the point of having them if they don't come to fruition?

The problem with these expectations is that when they fall through, I become disillusioned and disappointed.  In fact, I could even fall into a state of depression and hopelessness.  There are certain things I can expect from life, but they aren't based on my wants and desires.  Instead, these expectations are based on my actions and attitudes; I truly do reap what I sow. I can either sow seeds of sin and hopelessness, or I can stay faithful to God.

Live in Him

Sin is everywhere, especially in my own heart.  Selfishness, discontent, pride, hatred, gossip, worry, dissension, envy, slander and impurity can all be found in my heart.  

When I live to these sins, they become bigger and bigger in my life until Jesus can no longer be seen.  But when I do as Paul suggested and, "consider (myself) to be dead to the power of sin. . ." (Romans 6:11 NLT) then I can live in God through Christ Jesus.

If I die to sin, I can expect to live in Jesus just as He described (John 15:5).

Reign with Him

No one wants to simply survive.  I'd much rather think about having a life where I thrive, not just get through.  Sometimes, though, as much as Jesus promised an abundant life, that wealth doesn't show up as I expect. (John 10:10)  

I want a happy and fulfilling life, but sometimes I receive a difficult existence filled with suffering. Or, I dream of an abundance of money to share with others, but instead I am handed a life of living from paycheck to paycheck.  Or, I desire to do big things for God yet all I'm offered is seemingly meaningless work for Him.

The abundance Jesus promised can be found in my heart despite my external circumstances.  When I go through difficulties or disappointment, I can rejoice in these sufferings because it is a sign that not only will I share in the pain, but also in His triumph.  Endurance is more than just getting through.  Rather, it is to carry on despite the hardships, knowing that there is so much more waiting for me on the other side.

If I endure what God sends my way, I can expect to reign with Christ.

Disowned by Him

Big brothers or sisters are good at pretending their younger sibling is not related to them.  Hurtful treatment like this can cause a lot of friction but is thankfully not always a permanent situation: This stage usually ends once the elder reaches adulthood.  

With God, however, my refusal to acknowledge Christ as Lord over all things means He will treat me as a stranger before our Father in heaven.  (Matthew 10:33)  Sometimes I don't want to admit in front of others that I follow Jesus, but other times it's an issue of lordship.

It is easy to desire to retain control over certain areas of my life, such as my finances, or my hurt feelings, or my relationships.  If I truly want to say I belong to Him, however, I will need to prove it by submitting these areas to Him.  

If I disown Jesus as my Lord and Savior, I can expect to be disowned by Him.

With everything I expect out of life, there are only a few areas on which I can count.  If I die to sin I know I will live in Him.  Moreover, enduring the difficulties God sends my way will result in sharing in the triumph of Christ.  It's sobering to realize, however, how my inability to identify myself as a Christ follower will result in Him denying my kinship.  Thankfully, I can always expect God to be faithful, even when I can't be trusted.  He will never let me down, of that I can count!

As I begin this day it is my prayer that I will only expect what God promises.

How do I pin my hopes on a good life here and forget that eternity with Christ will far outshine anything I could dream of?

Can I think of a time when God has been faithful despite my unfaithfulness?

My Agenda

"After the people saw the miraculous sign that Jesus did,

they began to say,

'Surely this is the Prophet who is to come into the world.'

Jesus, knowing that they intended to come

and make him king by force,

withdrew again to a mountain by himself."

John 6:14-15

It's election season and I am inundated with political ads coming at me through my phone, in the newspaper, on the Internet and through the television.  Every candidate portrays themselves as the best possible choice, extolling their virtues, relevant experiences and productive record.  Everything a candidate says is colored by their agenda: First to get elected into office, then to accomplish certain tasks according to their beliefs and convictions.

I'm not a politician, but I have a few things in common with them.  I have an agenda, or certain things that I want out of life and I also tend to portray myself in the best possible light, hoping to garner the support of others.

I have my own expectation of how things should work, but God's plan rarely lines up with my agenda.  If I truly want Jesus to have lordship over my life, I'll need to line up my ways with His ways and let Him lead.

How to Live

Looking through my high school yearbook, I noted the following goals of the seniors who were about to embark on the journey of adulthood.  

"Get a job, make lots of money and take life one day at a time."

"Go to college, become a veterinarian, buy a Ferrari, find a gorgeous hunk, get married and have a romping time!"

"Get rich, get married, have babies and live happily ever after."

"To succeed in whatever I do."

"Move to Hawaii and become a beach bum."

Likewise, most of my goals in life are based on my own agenda.  I tend to make plans according to what will give me wealth, comfort and success.  I don't naturally drift toward poverty, struggles and failure, and in fact do whatever I can to avoid them.  If it were up to me I'd have enough money to never give me a reason to worry about expenses, enjoy good health all of my days and succeed in all my endeavors.  

God, however, is more concerned with my character than my comfort.  He is all about the inclinations of my heart and not at all about the ease of my circumstances.  God would rather I obey Him and live in poverty with a slew of failed business attempts behind me than for me to be a billion-dollar entrepreneur who never thinks of Him.

My agenda says to live a life of prosperity of health, wealth and family while God's idea of success concerns how my faith glorifies Him.

Use my Resources

I'll never forget a friend of mine who unwittingly taught me a lesson in generosity simply by sharing a bag of flour.  She had recently bought quite a few 5-pound bags of flour at a clearance sale where she paid 50 cents for each bag.  Her pantry was filled with bounty!  Instead of saving all the bags for herself, though, she willingly shared with me and her other friends.  

At the time, I remember thinking, I would have never thought to give the stuff away!  I would have been thankful that God had provided for my family in such a practical way and that I wouldn't have to buy flour for a year.  This got me to thinking about the things He has given to me.  Maybe everything I have was not meant for me but for someone else who is more in need than I.

My pastor says I should hold things with an open hand, being ready to give my belongings away as soon as the Holy Spirit prompts me to do so.  Unfortunately, I usually end up clutching my stuff with an iron grip.  I grow attached to the books on my shelf, the way my furniture looks in my living room, or in the comfort and convenience of my vehicle.  

In God's kingdom, however, everything belongs to God and has been entrusted into my care.  The way I handle the property, relationships and gifts He gives me says everything about where my priority lies.  If I refuse to help out a single mom who lost everything in a fire because I'm afraid to let go of some of the abundance I own, then I'm only concerned with me.

If I neglect the widow who can't feed her children because I don't want my family to find less food to choose from when they open the cupboard, then my agenda is more important than showing the love of God.

If I steer away from a fellow believer with a jaded past because I'm afraid to be seen with her, then my reputation is more important than encouraging her. 

Letting go of my agenda that is concerned with using my resources to only benefit me will result in the compassion of God ruling my life.

Company I Keep

I recently read a story of the Pied Piper who came into a town during the 13th Century and led all the children away to their demise by simply playing a fife.  It reminds me of how simple it is for me to get led away by someone who does not have my best interest at heart, but also how easily others can follow me.  The question is, what message am I delivering and where am I leading them?

Sometimes, I'm lured into a belief system that sounds like what I believe, but then I find out that there are all sorts of requirements that raise my suspicion.  Other times, my desire to lead a meaningful life drives me toward people who need "saving" and my goal becomes to build a following.  Many times, I only choose to hang around those who make me feel good about myself or with whom I feel comfortable.

In this way I am isolating myself from the very ones with whom God is drawing toward Him or who could humble and teach me.  Instead of being a lighthouse to guide the way of the lost to the Son, I am only focused on what feels good to me.  In looking out for my own reputation, I forsake the broken.  In tending to my own pleasure, I am veering away from those who are difficult to be around.

When choosing who I pursue, my highest consideration is to God and His plan.  If He brings someone prickly and challenging into my life, I can bank on the fact that she needs the love of God and can teach me something about compassion.  If a pregnant teen draws my attention, I can choose to pass right on by or spend some time giving her the encouragement of Christ.  If the grieving mother who turns to alcohol for comfort comes to my attention, I have the option of choosing what's best for me or what will most please God.

In order to give up my agenda, I'll need to make it a priority to spend time those whom God has placed in my path.

I have to admit that I do have an agenda, and that plan is all about me: my comfort, my success and my pleasure.  When I drop my agenda and adopt God's, I'll find that my life will never be the same.

As I begin this day it is my prayer that I will look closely at my life and consider where my agenda strays from God's.

When do I make decisions based on what's best for me instead of consulting God?

How has my relationship with God suffered because I'm afraid to step outside of my comfort zone?

Just Doin' My Job!

"Suppose one of you had a servant

plowing or looking after sheep.

Would he say to the servant when

 he comes in from the field,

'Come along now and sit down to eat'?

Would he not rather say, 

'Prepare my supper,

get yourself ready 

and wait on me while I eat and drink;

after that you may eat and drink'?

Would he thank the servant because he did

what he was told to do?

So you also,

when you have done everything you were told to do,

should say,

'We are unworthy servants;

we have only done our duty.'"

Luke 17:7-10

One of the worst jobs I ever held was working at a state park as a Ranger's assistant.  I actually enjoyed the position for the most part because I got to spend the whole day outside mowing, picking up litter, and helping with maintenance around the facility.  One of the revolting parts of the job, however, was the task of cleaning the restrooms.  After that summer, I gained a new respect for public bathroom janitors everywhere and to this day I make sure to give them an encouraging word whenever I see them doing their job.

Even though I dreaded that aspect of my job, there was a certain amount of satisfaction that came with cleaning up a disgusting bathroom.  No one ever knew that I was the one who scrubbed, mopped and disinfected, but I didn't do it for the recognition.  Quite frankly, I'd rather do anything else than scrub toilets to gain a little credit.  The only reason I tackled that task was because it was a part of my job description.

As a follower of Christ, I am to humble myself to the position of a servant. (Philippians 2:5-11)  A servant does her job without the expectation of reward or desiring feelings of well being, and with the attitude that serving is a privilege.  My very flesh cries out against this viewpoint, but it is the attitude of servant that Jesus held.  I, too, can carry that same manner when I walk in the light of His Spirit.  (Galatians 5:16-26)

Expectation

I have heard the story of an old man sitting alongside a road outside a certain city.  A traveler stopped to ask what kind of people he could expect inside this metropolitan area.  

"What were the people like where you came from?" The wise man asked.

"Mean, untrustworthy, detestable. . .pretty much a terrible lot."

The old man replied, "You will find them the same in the city ahead."

Soon another traveler stopped and asked the same question.  "What are the people like in this city?"

And the man responded likewise.  "What were they like where you came from?"

"They were fine people; honest, industrious and generous."

"So you will find them in the city ahead."

I do tend to find what I am looking for.  If my selfish fleshly desires rule and guide me as I live my life, I will tend to make decisions that are based on what I want, what will be best for me, and what will get me to where I want to go.  I expect the best, and I will do everything I can to make sure I receive what I think I deserve.

If, however, I let God have the lead as I walk in His Spirit, the choices I make will be based on what He wants, what is best for His kingdom, and what will get me onto His path of righteousness.  In this case, I expect what God chooses as best and will submit to His will for my life.

Taking on the attitude of a servant means I will not go after the rank, prestige or positions that are highly sought by those with a worldly mindset.  Instead, I will do the task that God has placed before me to do, expecting nothing in return.  This does not mean God will not give me good things.  It simply means I won't anticipate reward and use the hope of good things as my motivation.  Operating with this kind of self-centered expectation only leads to disappointment when I inevitably don't receive what I'm looking for.

If I want to have the attitude like that of Christ Jesus I will expect no worldly reward for doing whatever job God has given me to do.

Self-Esteem

I have to admit; it does feel good to do things for others.  Many times, I can feed off that sense of well-being and desire it more and more as my self-confidence grows.  Being needed by others can make me feel important and give me a feeling of purpose and significance.  

The Apostle Paul taught a contradictory teaching to the above sentiment.  Instead of doing that which makes me feel good about myself and my ministry, my driving force should be to obey God's calling on my life.  As I step into the path He has prepared for me, I will develop a passion for the task at hand.  Paul described his call to preach this way;  ". . when I preach the gospel, I cannot boast, for I am compelled to preach." (1 Corinthians 9:16)

When I am doing what God has called me to do, no one can stop me.  There is nothing in this world that could keep me from carrying out the mission: I am driven by the force of God's Spirit.  In this way, I will no longer feed off the high that comes from helping or being needed, but will simply go where God is propelling me to go.  Gone will be the hunger for esteem-building or purpose-finding.  All the glory will go to God because He is the one providing the passion, the power, the opportunity and the outcome.  I am simply a vessel.

If I want to have the attitude like that of Christ Jesus I will give God all the recognition by doing only what He calls me to do.

Privilege

Waiting tables has got to be one of the most demanding and least appreciated jobs in the service industry.  Servers receive the brunt of customer's complaints, bearing the burden of attempting to please the patrons assigned to their tables.  The job of a server requires one to, among other things, take orders, field questions, relay messages to the cook, fill orders, refill drinks and basically make sure the dining experience is a pleasant one.  No wonder there is such a high turnover in the serving industry!

Many who hold these jobs only consider it a transitional position: Not many really want to wait tables their whole lives.  Instead, it's a means to an end.  There are, however, some who consider it a privilege to serve others and take delight in meeting the expectations of the diners.

I can take on the attitude like that of these waiters.  They don't have it any easier than the other servers.  The customers they serve are just as demanding and difficult.  The only difference is in the meaning they place on their job; they see it as important.

I, too, could see my present position as vital to the workings of the kingdom.  Instead of feeling like my life has no meaning or significance, I could go before the Lord and talk to Him about the position He has placed me.  As He opens my eyes to the value found in my circumstances and the impact God could have on others through me, my attitude will change.  

Wiping noses suddenly becomes an opportunity to show love to my child.  Cleaning up after someone spilled coffee turns into a chance to demonstrate God's love in my workplace.  Volunteering to pick up litter is transformed into a chance to let the light of Jesus shine throughout my neighborhood.

There are some jobs I would rather not lower myself to do, but in God's kingdom, there are no small jobs and everything done out of obedience to Him is important.

If I want to have the attitude like that of Christ Jesus I will find it a privilege to serve others in any way I can.

It doesn't come naturally for me to think like a servant, but it's possible when I commit myself to God.  He will transform my mind so that I can drop the expectations of receiving a payoff for my efforts and of doing things in order to make myself feel better, and replace those with the idea that its a privilege to serve others.  In this way I will become more and more like Jesus.

As I begin this day it is my prayer that I can stop expecting to receive a benefit from serving.

When am I motivated to act out of a selfish impulse?

How do I consider it an insult to serve instead of an honor?

  

Going the Distance

"And whatever you do, 

whether in word or deed, 

do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, 

giving thanks to God the Father through him."

Colossians 3:17

"Our attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:

 Who, being in very nature God, 

   did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, 

 but made himself nothing, 

   taking the very nature of a servant. . ."

Philippians 2:5-7a

I have heard it said that, "No good deed goes unpunished."  While it may sometimes seem this way, this sentiment is more of a cry of frustration when I do things for the wrong reasons than an adage by which to live.

As a follower of Christ, I can choose to do things out of "Christian duty," or obligation or to fulfill an expectation others have for me.  It's almost as if I'm carrying out the work in accordance with a job description for Christians that could go something like this.  "Love others at all times, serve tirelessly, think of others more highly than self, preach the gospel at every opportunity and do it all with a gracious and gentle spirit."

That is a tall order!  While all of those criteria came straight from scripture, I cannot expect to fulfill them in my own strength or out of sheer will.  Jesus reminds me in John 15:5 that I can't do it on my own.  He said, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing."

Trying to do things out of my own strength with lead to discouragement, frustration and disappointment.  But there is a better way.

Motivation

Steven Curtis Chapman sings a song which speaks to my desire to do things that matter.  The monotonous, everyday things seem meaningless and doing them day in and day out can lead to feelings of frustration, discontentment and bitterness.  I think, What's the point.  No one cares, no one ever thanks me and I don't think I'm making much of a difference.  

Take a moment to listen to, "Do Everything."

Why do I do the things I do?  If I do them to please others, I will grow increasingly discouraged and may become irritable around those I am serving.  

If, instead, I do it out of a love for God, seeking to please Him in all that I do, there will be peace and contentment in my heart.  I want to be able to say, as the Apostle Paul did in Galatians 1:10, "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ."

If my motivation for doing all the things that must be done in life is to please God, I will not grow discouraged.

Expectations

As a wife and mother, I have a lot of expectations.  Some of them are reasonable, some are excessive.  All, however, are completely mine.

During my husband's Army career, our family moved to Germany.  As part of the preparation for this transfer, we received a packet of information about the country in which we'd be living.  Knowing what to expect was very helpful and made for an easier transition.

Expectations influence my attitude.  Paul explained in Philippians 2:5-7 (see above) how I can improve my attitude and keep from becoming frustrated when my expectations regarding how I should be treated are not met.  Knowing what to expect from others is beneficial.

Jesus is God the Son, creator of heaven and earth and worthy of all praise.  In the end, every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that He is Lord.  (Philippians 2:9-11)  If He came to earth as a human and expected to be treated as a lowly servant, to be spat upon and treated like dirt, how can I as a sinful human who is the enemy of God without the blood of Jesus expect better treatment?  

If my expectation is for others to treat me as Jesus was treated instead of demanding respect and regard, then I will not be disappointed

Attitude

William Bennett, conservative politician and writer said, "There are no menial jobs, only menial attitudes."  The way I see myself and my lot in life influences my outlook.  Knowing that God has located me in the position I now hold, placed specific people around me according to His plan and gave me the responsibilities that sometimes feel overwhelming can change my attitude.  

Everything happens for a reason and there is no such thing as a fluke.  If I believe this, my attitude will be one of thankful acceptance.

There is a lot of work to be done, as Jesus said, "The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few." (Luke 10:2)  But how long I last out in the field depends upon my motivation for doing the work, and my expectation in how I will be treated.   Both result in an attitude that can either make me or break me.  

As I begin this day, it is my prayer that I can do everything to please God, not to make myself look good or to meet others expectations for me.

How does my attitude quickly take a nose dive as I am met with unforeseen difficulties?  

How does my expectation that others will treat me with respect show a desire to glorify myself instead of God?