The Plague of Doubt

". . .the angel said to him: 'Do not be afraid, Zechariah; 

your prayer has been heard.

Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son,

and you are to give him the name John. . .'

Zechariah asked the angel, 'How can I be sure of this?

I am an old man and my wife is well along in years?'

The angel answered, 'I am Gabriel.

I stand in the presence of God, 

and I have been sent to speak to you

and to tell you this good news.

And now you will be silent and not able to speak

until the day this happens,

because you did not believe my words, 

which will come true at their proper time.'"

Luke 1:13, 18-20

I remember when my oldest daughter was 4-years old.  She was always a chatterbox, but when she came into the age of inquisition, she became an interrogator worthy of the CIA or FBI.

"Come on, honey, it's time for me to give you and your sisters a bath."

"Why?"

"Because you're dirty and it's almost time for bed.  It's nice to go to bed clean."

"Why?"

"So you won't get the sheets dirty."

"Why?"

"Because then I'll need to wash the linens and I'd rather not make so much work for myself."

"Why?"

"Because I already have enough to do, now come on and gather up your sister's pajamas and let's head into the bathroom."

"Why, Mommy?"

"Because I said so!"

Preschoolers are naturally curious, constantly seeking to learn about the world around them.  I, too, tend to want to know why things are a certain way or what makes someone do what they do. There's nothing wrong with a healthy interest in what makes things tick.  Take Mary, for instance.  When the same angel that visited Zechariah showed up in her presence, Gabriel gave her some astounding news: you are going to have a baby named Jesus who will grow up to be some kind of ruler over a never-ending kingdom and will even be called the Son of the Most High. (Luke 1:26-38)

Mary accepted this shocking news but showed a simple curiosity in how it would all come about since she wasn't married.  How would she become pregnant; how was God going to bring this about?  There was no question as to whether this event would happen, just an interest in how it would occur.

Zechariah, on the other hand, questioned the accuracy of this message and God's ability to bring it to pass.  To make his point, he called attention to the old age of he and his wife.  

Curiosity is not discouraged by God; only doubt.  I am reminded in Hebrews 11:6, that without faith, or the ability to believe something will happen, it is impossible to please God.  

But I am prone to doubt, just like Zechariah.  His experience reminds me that there are consequences for my doubt.  Thankfully, my doubt will not stop the will of God.  Just as God's promise still came to pass in the form of a baby named John, God's purpose will always go forth. (Isaiah 14:26-27)  The only question is: Will I be a part of it, or will I be watching from the sidelines, mute and paralyzed by fear and disbelief?

God's Sovereignty

My husband and I owned a tandem bike for a period of time.  It was difficult for me to ride in back while he controlled the handlebars and brakes.  Donald decided in which direction to go and when it was time to stop.  If we rode down a hill, only he could slow it down.  In a nutshell, my husband had all the control and I had none.

This is kind of how it is with me and God.  He decides the direction my life will take, how fast I need to go, when it's time for a bumpy ride and when I need to stop for a rest.  This is His world and He's in control.

The problem is, I possess this desire to know my own future.  I want to know the details of what's coming up ahead.  When I give into this desire, I attempt to figure out what is happening and what I think will be the expected outcome.  I analyze all the possible angles, coming up with solutions for each scenario.  I spend a lot of time thinking about the issues at hand.  Much to my dismay, the reality is that this is the definition of "worry."

When I doubt God's ability to lead me well and hesitate to give Him control, I fall into an anxious heap.  Jesus said not to go after our needs or to try to orchestrate the details of my life because God knows what I need.  Instead, He said to, "seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things (all my needs) will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow  will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own."  (Matthew 6:32-34)

Worry and anxiety is a sign that I'm not trusting God's sovereignty and His ability to lead me well.  

If I want to avoid the plague of doubt when it comes to God's control over my life, I must learn to trust Him enough to place everything in His capable hands.  (Philippians 4:4-7)

God's Calling

God asked the impossible from a man who doubted.  He wondered how God could possibly use a reject like him to deliver such an important message to His people.  What if they didn't listen?  What if they didn't believe him?  What if he couldn't get the words out?  Who am I to do something so big?

The question is not, as Rafiki of the Lion King asked Simba, "who are you?"  Rather, the inquiry I should constantly make is, "who is God?"  You see, God's calling on my life has nothing to do with me.  It isn't dependent upon my abilities, gifts or desires.  Instead, it is about God and His ability.

When Moses asked God, "Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?"  God's reply was, "I will be with you."  (Exodus 3:11-12)

In the same way, when God places a burden on my heart for the hurting and downtrodden in my own neighborhood, but I'm afraid I won't be able to do the job, I can remember that God is with me.

Or when God convicts me to teach a Bible study despite my lack of degree in Bible teaching, I can take heart that God is with me.

Or when God inclines my heart toward the people of a third-world country even though I've always hated to travel, I will gain courage from the fact that God is with me.  It's not up to me.

The anecdote to doubt in the face of God's calling is to remember that God is with me and He will accomplish what He set out to do.

God's Plan

Clouds are looming on the horizon.  My way seems dark with no way out.  Voices laugh tauntingly as I continue down the path that seems destined for doom.  Should I continue on the way my Master pointed?  I wonder as my foot falls in a pothole.  Is this the way He meant for me?  It seems wrong; filled with pain and suffering.  How can this be right?

Which way is God leading that seems risky or perhaps not something I would choose for myself?  When I read that the Lord said, "For I know the plans I have for you. . .plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future," it's easy for me to form a picture in my mind of what those plans may look like.  I see comfort, pleasure and fulfillment.  

Then reality sets in as the test from the doctor comes back positive, the daughter goes missing or the loved one moves on to someone else.  How can anything good come out of this?  

Just as God allowed hard things to enter Job's life in order to test his faith, sometimes God allows trials and difficulties in the same way.  Other times, God's plan includes working with people I don't like, doing I job I don't particularly enjoy, or sticking with a marriage that brings unhappiness.  

Living a life of faith devoid of doubt means I'll have to do as Solomon instructed in Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT.  "Trust in the LORD with all you heart; do not depend on your own understanding.  Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take."  

In order to stop doubting, I must trust God's plan as good, even when it seems bad.

Asking questions of God is not forbidden, but doubting whether He is really in control of all things, is calling me to do something big or even small, or has a plan for my life comes at a price.  To fight the plague of doubt, I'll have to place my life in His hands, remember that He equips the called, and that His plan is good no matter how it looks to me.  Then I will avoid the consequences that come with disbelief and be able to say as Mary did, "I am the Lord's servant.  . .May it be to me as you have said."  (Luke 1:38)

As I begin this day it is my prayer that I can trust God with my whole heart and let go of the fear that holds me back.

When do I let my own insecurities hold me back from answering God's calling?

How do I judge a hard thing as not from God?

  

Ancient of Days

"'I, even I, am the LORD,

and apart from me there is no savior.

I have revealed and saved and proclaimed--

I, and not some foreign god among you.

You are my witnesses,' declares the LORD, 

'that I am God.  Yes, and from ancient days I am he.

No one can deliver out of my hand.

When I act, who can reverse it?'"

Isaiah 43:11-13

The world is changing.  Governments are crumbling.  Once-powerful nations are losing their might.  People are suffering.  Children are dying from lack of clean water and sufficient food.  Wars are raging.  Natural disasters are destroying.  The world is descending into darkness.

If all the bad news I hear and read about each day were the whole story, I would be without hope. Thankfully, the Ancient of Days is on the throne!  Despite the appearance that the world is tail spinning out of control, there is One who reigns supreme.  He holds each of our lives in the palm of His hand, and He has a plan.  I can trust that His will is going to come to pass.  This is His world and He has not lost the authority or dominion, regardless of how it seems.

Everlasting  

I remember reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory as a child.  I was intrigued by the idea of he Everlasting Gobstopper which, according to Willie Wonka, was indestructible and made for children with very little money in their pocket.  The candy could never be finished, and even resisted growing smaller: it was everlasting.

Even though this fictional candy does not exist in the form described in the book, there is One who is never diminished and who has no beginning nor end.  Moses prayed, "Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations.  Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God."  (Psalm 90:1-2)

In a world where everything is changing, it's good to know that God stays the same. As Lincoln Brewster sings in Everlasting God, "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord."  As you listen to the words, spend some time meditating on how the everlasting qualities of God affect the way you live your life as His child.  I can trust Him, depend on Him, lean on Him and He will comfort me, strengthen me, protect me, and defend me.   Always.  

Even though everything around me seems to be crumbling, God has always reigned, and will always reign, now and forevermore!

Able to Save

I remember hearing the story of a girl who was unable to save her sister from drowning in a lake.  Her failure weighed upon her throughout her life and kept her living in the past, unable to move beyond this horrible tragedy.  She held herself accountable for her sister's death even though everyone around her told her it was not her fault.  She couldn't get over the fact that she was unable to save her beloved.

Looking in from the outside, it is absurd for a mere human to put that much pressure on themselves.  There is only so much one can do, but it is easy to feel responsible for the health and well being of those I love.  This, however, is not a part of my job description.  I am not called to save anyone.  That is God's job!  He is the only one who is able to save.

The people of Israel knew this firsthand as they walked out of Egypt, free of the oppressive hand of the cruel Pharaoh who had enslaved them for so many years.  When God told them to prepare for departure by killing an unblemished lamb and spreading the blood on their doorposts, they had no idea the plan that God was putting into motion.  That night, the Angel of Death came to the land of Egypt.  All those who had the protective covering of the blood of the lamb were passed over, but those whose doorways were clean and unprotected experienced the wrath of God in the loss of their firstborns.  

Cries of mourning pierced the air that day as the Israelites walked out of Egypt, finally free.  Hundreds of years later, another Lamb, this One perfect, shed His blood as a protective covering  from the wrath of God for all those who receive it. 


If God is able to reconcile me, a sinful woman to Him, a holy God, surely God is able to save in other ways, as well.  He can save me from the deep pit of depression from where no man can climb out and save himself.  He can rescue me from the pain of past hurts from where no amount of human counseling can release me.  He can resuscitate a marriage, dead and buried, from beyond where no amount of effort can bring it back to life.  God is able to save.


God said through the prophet Isaiah, "Turn to me and be saved, all you ends of the earth; for I am God, and there is no other."  (Isaiah 45:22)


 Even though everything around me seems to be at risk, God is able to save from His wrath as well as from present troubles.  

Irreversible

I've heard the words many times, spoken at the end of a wedding ceremony, " . . .what God has joined together, let man not separate."  (Matthew 19:6)  It is decreed with the authority of God and with reverence for Him.  What God creates is permanent, meant to last and irreversible.  

How unlike our present age where anything can be undone, from crimes committed, surgeries performed to damage done.  If one has enough money, power and resolve, almost any action can be reversed.

I must be very careful not to let this mentality creep into my perception of the LORD.  His plan is, ". . . determined for the whole world; this is the hand stretched over all nations.  For the LORD Almighty has purposed, and who can thwart him?  His hand is stretched out, and who can turn it back?" (Isaiah 14:26-27) No matter how good one may be at persuading others to go along with their plan, God can never be swayed.  His plan stands firm, and anyone who fights against Him will lose.

I don't usually think of myself as one who is struggling against God, but when I insist on knowing the who, what, when, where and why before I will follow Him, I am.  If I stubbornly continue in an area of addiction, whether it be to drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, shopping, exercise, eating, or even scrabooking, I am making that activity more important than God and defying His commandments.  If I think I don't fight against God but fail to give Him my full attention, I am fooling myself.  There are many ways to resist God, and every one of them will put me on the losing team.  

Even though I live in a fast-food, temporary, throw-away society, I can choose to follow the permanent, irreversible God.  The One who values all human life and protects it at all cost; the One who stands firm for what is right even when all those around are caving to popular opinion; the One who joins a man and a woman together and gives them the grace and love to make it last forever.  This is the God I choose to follow.

Even though everything around me seems to be decaying, I can purposefully follow the One who is irreversible.

The world in which I live is fallen.  Thus, there is much about which to feel dismayed.  But I can be thankful that the Ancient of Days lasts forever, can salvage the seemingly hopeless and is permanent in nature.  My God is on the throne!

As I begin this day it is my prayer that I will remember that God reigns.  Nothing can overpower Him or dethrone Him.

How do I live my life as if everything were temporary?

When do I feel helpless and without hope when I worship a God who is able to save me?

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